There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
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