see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
