Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Randomize
