mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I bet he comes in French.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize