Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Randomize
