i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
