She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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