Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Randomize
