I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
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