i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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