Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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