There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Randomize
