do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
