Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
