only if we run a train.
done.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
