I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
