I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Randomize
