you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Randomize