So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Randomize
