real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Randomize
