Your tits are I can't wait for
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
