So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
