her vagine was all disorganized.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize