And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
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