Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Randomize
