hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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