She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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