More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize