I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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