The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Randomize
