Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Randomize