so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
