I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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