As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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