I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
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