Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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