So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize
