How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize