They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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