this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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