So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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