The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize