Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
