Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Actions speak louder than pants.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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