I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize