we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
