he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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