Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
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