Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
