So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize