she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
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