Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
